So it has been more than a months since I have written.......

A lot has happened in that month. I made a final decision about gradschool. I decided that I am going to defer my admission and go back to school fall of 2006 instead of next fall. My heart just was not excited about it. I think it is the right thing to do. That along with a new possibility at work of taking on some other responsibilities and moving beyond what I am currently doing. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

On a personal note, it has been a bit of an emotional roller coaster for me. There was some excitement about someone that came back into my life, but in the end my heart was too fragile to deal with it. It seems that I too easily throw my heart out there and expect everyone to accept and to feel the same way about me as I do with them, but that is not always the case. My friend calls it passion but sometimes I think it is stupidity and recklessness. Not everyone is like me.

My uncle passed away 2 weeks ago and it is still very tough for me. We were close and I always felt a connection with him. From the day I was born he has always looked out for me and loved me. He was ill for a while but I was not really aware of it. He died at the age of 66 which I think is way to young. It was especially tough cause it was around the same time that my grandmother passed away 4 years ago, it seems like this is deja vu all over again, with some of the same type of stuff happening again.

Sometimes, I feel like I am so wrapped up in my own life that I neglect to think about my family. They are incredibly important to me and I never ever let them know enough how much they mean to me.