Bah Humbug...

So much for the joy and good will towards men. Only one day after Christmas, I was struck smack dab in the face by racism. I was waiting for the bus on a very snowy and wet day and trying to think happy positive thoughts to keep me warm when a man walked passed me and muttered something. I wasn't quite sure of what he said, I think he said "too many chinks". My first reaction was anger, how could this small minded person say that to me but then I calmed down thought that maybe I mis-heard. My bus arrived and he got on in front of me and I tried to not think much about it. I got off at my stop and he was behind me, this time I distinctively heard racist remarks. I stopped and turned around, I was about to confront him, saying something like too many "ignorant small minded people in the world". I really wanted to tell this guy off and then I realized that a) he was bigger than me b) he had a mental illness (not just his ignorance but a clear mental issue)and c) it was very cold and wet outside and I didn't want to argue with him. I think that when I turned around he was uncertain of what I was doing. I gave him a smile and said that he could go in front of me. I was trying to be a better person. Although, I think he was ill, his remarks still stung. It brought back a flood of memories of all the racist things others have said to me throughout my lifetime. For the most part I live my life unconscious of race or of me being anything other than me until someone says something like this. I cannot believe that in this day an age someone, anyone still uses these hateful words.