Heart Broken

On Saturday bright and early, nursing a hangover I went to our baseball game. (it seems that I have had a boat load of farewell parties where the main objective is to get Char drunk). Even though I cheered my little heart out for my boys, we lost our baseball game and thus dashing everyone's hopes of going to the Koshien. For my gr. 12's (whom I absolutely adore), this was their final game of their baseball careers. As you can imagine, there were tears and much crying. It is strange to see some of these tough boys cry. I was absolutely heartbroken. For me, it was probably the last time I would see my baseball boys too. I was just as sad as their were.

As I wrote previously, I was given one of their warm up jerseys as a present, I wore it proudly to their game. One of my cheekier gr. 11's came up to me and said he wanted it. I told him we should trade, so we traded, I now have his jersey and he has mine. I thought it was really sweet, that he liked me enough, (perhaps too much some times) that he wanted to wear my name. I was touched when he showed the rest of the team and everyone oohed and ahhed. This is probably one of my special memories of Japan.

I cannot stress enough, how special this years kids are to me. They have been absolutely great in class and always eager to talk to me. I am sad that I cannot take them home with me. I will miss rubbing their little buzzed baseball hair cuts. They have gotten so used to me doing this, that they just stick their heads up when I walk past.

I am feeling so sad right now, teary eyed and emotional.

I also had the experience of going to a Japanese funeral, something that I did not want to experience. My vice-principal died after being sick for a long time. I was not particularly close with him but I do remember the odd times he would ask me about basketball and the Vancouver Grizzlies. He was not afraid to talk to me at all. It was refreshing. I will miss him.

Time is flying by

I am sad, one by one my friends are heading home and returning to their respective countries. It has not really hit me yet that in September I will not be able to just ride over to their houses and visit them. It feels like everyone is just going on summer vacation or something, not like they are leaving Japan for good.

You go through so much here together and your friends are the ones that make sure you do not go completely bonkers on those really bad days in Japan. Trust me, there are many of them.

Oh, I am sad that everyone is leaving and that I have to leave too.

My kiddies...as awful as some of them were in class, they never listened and never did any work....but yet I know that I will miss them a lot. They are my kids and I love some of them to death. They are what has made my time in Japan memorable.


There was a point last September when I thought my contract would never and I could not leave fast enough. I had just returned from Canada and thought that I could not possibly endure another year of being in Japan. I was homesick as soon as I stepped off the plane and really did not want to be in Japan. Well, that was 10 months ago and now I cannot believe that I will be leaving in a little more than a week. In a complete reversal of feelings, I have pangs of homesickness for Japan when I think about leaving.

The 2 years have gone by in a blink of an eye and I am having a hard time with packing and leaving. It has been a great adventure. For the first time I was living entirley on my own in a foreign country not speaking the language. I figure if I can survive Japan I can probably take on many things. Heck, I taught almost 900 hormonal teenagers in 2 years. That says something about learning to cope and survive....

Anyways, just a reflective mood I am in..............

"Take me out the the ball game"

In Japan, baseball is their third religion behind Shinto and Budhism. Summer is the peak of highschool baseball with prefectural baseball championships. Every higschool baseball player dreams of going to the Koshien (the mecca of highschool baseball), to play in the National championships.

Busloads of students are shipped to baseball stadiums where accompanied by the school band and megaphones everyone cheers their school team on.
Yesterday we had our first game of the prefectural tournament. We all loaded into the bus to go to the stadium, or band, cheerleaders, leader club (sort of pep club), along with several large drums. Once we got there, megaphones were handed out and the coordinated cheers began. First you do a cheer for the opposing team and bow to them, wishing them good luck. Each player that bats has their own cheer, song or dance. The pitcher has a cheer too. I cannot believe the utter madness of it all. My normally shy and reserved students show their true spirit. They never get to yell and scream and be normal kids unitl now. It was so much fun to be a part of the baseball madness. It is insane to see 500 people doing the same dance at the same time.

I must say that all along my baseball boys have been some of my favourite students and this is a great way to spend my last two weeks here, cheering them on and being a part of it all. You know you are in far to deep when you are just as worried as the players when you are behind, or when you yell at the umpire cause you think your player was safe. It was like it was me out there playing. You have to experience highschool baseball in Japan to know what I mean.

Last day of school

Today was the last official day of school, although the kids will be required to come to school periodically or if they are in a club then almost every day. Not much of a summer break if you ask me. I will also be required to come to school until my contract is finished which is on July 28th. Nothing but sitting around all day.

We had closing ceremonies and I had to make a speech, I was super nervous seeing how it was all in Japanese. I managed to get through all of it without too many mistakes and without any tears, although my voice did waver a bit.

I am sad to leave what I think as my second home. I have spent two years here and I must say that it has been a wonderful experience that I will probably never forget. The kids are definately what has made it wonderful.

I had lunch with some of my Gr. 12's today, then spent the better part of the afternoon talking to them. What a change from 2 years ago, when the kids were scared to even approach me. I will miss these little hellions far more than they will ever realize.

Stuff and more stuff

I seem to have a bottomless closet. I take things out of it and it seems that more things magically appear in its' place. I have been packing for over a month now and it still seems like I have to pack more. My apartment is covered with random things and big cardboard boxes. I walk into my apartment and feel like my stacks of stuff are going topple over in a clothing avalanche and bury me alive. I hate packing about as much as I hate saying good byes.

ARRGHGGH!! It is almost worth it to stay in Japan another year so I don't have to deal with the packing and good byes.

Sayonara

July has been the say good bye month for me for 3 years now. I don't like good byes and have a hard time with them.

Yesterday, we had a good bye sushi lunch with all my fellow English teachers. I was touched by the kind words spoken about me and the sense that I will be missed. I got a good bye present that I had requested with an unexpectant surprise. I wanted a bag my baseball team has. It is an "official baseball bag" with my name on it and Daiichi (my school) written on it. It is perfect and exactly what I wanted. It reminds me of my school and my baseball boys, whom I love. They are usually the best kids in the class and the ones to come talk to me. To get that bag you have to be a member of the baseball team and actually be a good player. I think that I am perhaps the only girl ever to own the Daiichi Baseball team bag.

I also received a baseball warm up jersey, with my name on it. Surprised by that one.

So sad to say good bye and to realize that I leave in two weeks. How fast time goes by.

Yukata-kai

A yukata is a light weight cotton summer Kimono.

I had been taking lessons on how to wear a Yukata and tie the belt. I had the intentions of studying how to put on a Kimono but because of lack of time and the cost of accumulating all the Kimono accessories (underwear, ties, belts, clips, in addition to the thousand dollar kimono), I decided to learn to wear the yukata.

So, I have been practicing for 3 weeks now and yesterday we had a party were everyone was dressed in Yukatas and kimonos. It was partly a demonstration too. So, we got up on stage and tied it infront of everyone. I was a bit nervous standing infront of everyone, in addition to the newspaper being there to take pictures of the silly foreigners. Because in Japan, an event instantly becomes international relations when a foreigner is present

So, I had a wonderful time. After the sit down dinner we of course piled into the cars in our yukatas and went to the mall. It is quite an interesting sight, when you have 7 people all dressed in traditional Japanese summer clothing walking through the mall. Of course we had to stop for Starbucks and take Print Club (print club is little photo stickers that are a huge hit here). Only in Japan would I be wearing a Yukata, drinking Starbucks, and taking Print Club.




It was a wonderful experience and a great way to cap off my stay in Japan.

Honoury Envoy to Toyama

Yesterday I had a ceremony whereby I was presented with plaques bestowing the honour of special honoury envoy to Toyama. Keeping in mind that this title can be revoked at any time if I have behaviour that is unbecoming of this title. Not sure what kind of behaviour that is...perhaps if I say that the water in Toyama in not Oishi or the fish not fresh.

Oshii = delicious

Honorary Envoy= Friend of Toyama

All done with my exams

Regardless if it is grading exams or if it is writing exams, the feeling of relief when you are done with them is the same regardless.

I finished grading today, over 300 exams in the span of one week. I am a machine....

Two balls....

Last Friday I was sitting on my desk, when the captain of the boys volleyball team came up to me. He said they were having a practice game on Saturday and if I was free I should come. Of course being the dedicated ALT, I would show up to school on Saturday.

So I drag my butt to school, literally dragging it seeing how I was out until 1:30 the night before.
Anyways, I was on the second floor of the gym, (we have a indoor track above the gym where you can watch from), when the captain sends one of the players up to get me so I can sit on the bench beside the coach. I walk in there and everyone bows.

So, they finish the game and everyone comes over for the aisatsu (greetings and thank you to your coach, usually the coach gives them advice or something). So it being Japan, they did it to me too. It is a sign of respect for your elders, yup I am an elder alright.
Saying something about well "your blocking was off and that the take off for the tandem play should have been the center hitter going up then the off side hitter going up, the third hit in the second play should have been from the power side and not the off side"......hmmm...yup, my days of competitive vollyeball is over.

So, I get up to walk out of the gym, when the captain says wait. So, he comes out with two volleyballs, one a practice ball that I can use to play with, the other a official "daiichi high school ball, with all their names signed on it.

I was all choked up, tears formed and I had to struggle to hold them in, my boys...I cannot believe it. It was so sweet....

Making a difference......my goal for my second year....perhaps making the difference in me....

Tired

I saw Charlie's angels last night. Good movie. Funny!

I have been on the computer all morning. No classes because of exams. So I get to sit on my ass. Should be studying Japanese or writing my farewell speeches, but currently looking for internships. Nothing so far...been on it for 2 hours....eyes are going wonky.

2010 Olympics

Vancouver got the 2010 Olympics. Yippie!!

finished

My career as an English teacher is over. I taught my last class today and it was sad for me. Got a little teary eyed. I will definately miss those little misfits.

I am filled with mixed emotions, sad that I will not get to see these kids again but terribly homesick. So homesick that it hurts....

I missed Canada Day. Did not even realize it was yesterday.....

News

Intruder

I had an intruder on Monday night, while I was brushing my teeth I feel this thing walk across my feet, I look down to discover a large cockroach the size of a bar of soap...well okay not quite that large but large enough. I jump up out of my bathroom and run for the bug spray. I proceed to use half the can of spray on him, cause he kept moving, then sucked him up in the vacuum and sprayed more spray into the vacuum. He better be dead!! I had been searching for him for a week now. I first caught site of him last week but was not quick enough to kill him. He better be the only intruder and better not have been a spy sent ahead or else I am going to move out of my apartment before I leave Japan. As you can tell, I hate bugs.

How do you talk about yourself?

I asked my supervisor for a letter of recommendation...man...was that difficult, after humming and searching, then asking the principal, I was told to write it myself....lovely...how do you write a glowing letter of recommendation without feeling guilty about being a braggart?


Changed my blog
As you can tell I changed my blog. I was having problems so I decided to change the template. Plus I have some time on my hands.

The first of My Last Classes

Well, two years have almost come and gone now. This week I had the first of my last classes. Exams start next Thurs. and thus I will not be teaching my Thurs. and Friday classes anymore after tomorrow. It was sad...the kids have been well...interesting..sometimes they make me laugh and sometimes they make me so mad that I could cry. It has been a learning experience with them. I guess, no matter how mad they made me, I will always remember them and think of them as my kids.

Well, my I-nensei's whom I know the least and probably are not most favourite kids even made me a littled choked up. At the beginning and end of class students stand, bow and greet. Well, for my final act with the kids I was asked to lead it. It is a privledge to do so and a confirmation that I am one of them. It does not seem like much but it is something. I also was told that I would be missed and had my hand shaken.

My III-nensei's, my favourites, I asked them to write a letter to me. Many of the letters were very sweet and I was touched by their sentiment and at the end I took a class picture with them. They were very kind and I was told that I will be missed.

As a side note, I got a double on a bike by one of my students. I was going to the convenience store for somethign to eat and she said she would double me. Well, what a sight that was in my skirt. Imgaine , me on the back of a bike with my skirt hiked up. Yeah, great image for a teacher.

Perhaps, they will not remember me when I leave but these little things make my stay in Japan worthwhile. My reason was that I was going to make a difference but perhaps it was not making a difference in them but in myself that was more important. I hope that I have left some kind of impression on them, cause they sure as hell have left one on me.

Man, this leaving bit is going to be tougher than I thought. I only had to deal with last classes today.

Fathers

Thank God for fathers. I do not know what I would do without mine. My dad is always the person I turn to when I need advice or need encouragement. I cannot remember how many times in university at 4 O'clock in the morning I would call my dad and fret about a final exam I was sure I was going to flunk. Well, after sending out many a cover letters and resumes, and still not hearing from anyone, I was really disappointed and ready to work at starbucks. Well, my dad being who he is, told me not to worry. He believes that something will come up and that it will work out. It is nice when someone believes in you, when you don't believe in yourself. Cheers, to Dads and the secret powers they have.

Donations

Finally, paid for my trip home this summer. I have decided to take a detour home. I will stop in Nepal and India on my way back to Vancouver. I will be participating in the NEST program in Nepal running education programs in a school 6 hours outside of Kathmandu. I will be doing English lessons along with talking about health and sanitation. My plan is to leave Japan on the 1st of Aug. and be back in Vancouver around the 24th.

I am also hoping that you can help me out with donations. The school that I am going to is really poor and they need funds for books and programs. I have been asked to help raise some funds for them. So, if you are interested in donating to a good cause and providing education to individuals in Nepal, please contact me via email. Even a few dollars in nepal can go a long way. So many times we take education and books for granted.

Update


Last Sunday I played sound table tennis. It is for the visually impaired. Inside a ping pong ball there is ball bearings that make noise. The object of the game is instead of getting it over the net, it goes under the net with essentially the same rules as ping pong. The people playing were really good, surprising at first seeing how their reaction time is based on hearing where the ball is. I got my butt kicked around.

Hmmm...what else is new....had my farewell party with my Japanese teacher. My Japanese lessons are officially over. Sad, seeing how I still feel like I have not learnt enough Japanese.

Matrix Reloaded

I finally got to see it this weekend. The verdict is 3 out of 5 stars....It was okay..the story was harder to follow this time...and less thinking involved for the viewers, and too much action.....the 30 min. car chase scene....all in all a bit disappointing...

On a much happier note, I did rent "life as a house"...great movie, I really liked it....go and rent it if you have not seen it yet....

Milan or Toyama

Last night I went to a dinner party for the Hokuriku-Canada Association. A group of Japanese people that are interested in Canada and plan a get together once a year. Being the proud Canadian that I am, of course I went, the incentive being the free food and the Labatts beer. My fellow Canadian JET's also were in attendance. Well, part way through the informal dinner 3 people walk in, one dressed very hip in a dark shirt and dark tie while another in a funky shirt and shades. I turn to my friend Elita and we both say simultaneously, Who is that? Being that we think every foreigner in this area is an English teacher and we should know each other. Jokingly, Elita said perhaps they were rock stars, seeing how they were not dressed for an occasion like that. Meaning: stuffy serious Japanese get togethers. It turns out they were the preformers for a concert that we had missed earlier that evening. They toured with Chantal Kreviazick and have an album in Europe. Not sure if they are famous but they are doing several shows in Tokyo and Toronto in a few weeks. Elita and I spent most of the time talking to them, with their cute French accents and all. At the end of the night their was an invitation to go out for a drink and see the sights of Toyama when they were finished with their dinner. Phone numbers were exchanged.

Well, while walking back from the "Canada" night, we are stopped by some men obviously lost. So, at first I thought they were Russians, but then they spoke with an Italian accent. They were here preforming La Boheme and needed directions to their hotel. So, being the kindly Canadians that we were decided to walk with them. They did not speak English or Japanese so of course, I pull out the international language of love, French. We proceeded to have a conversation in Italian, English, and French. I also acted as translator when they were looking for a good Sushi restaurant. I had no clue so of course I asked the person working in the cafe. My friends thought that we should of gotten tickets for all our hard work.

Well, the four of us ALT's who had been at the Canadian night soiree stepped into a small cafe to have coffee and chat about our respective schools, bitching and complaing more accurately describes it. Pretty soon, we were overwhelmed by Italians in the cafe. It was like we were in Italy, with the Italian free flowing and the expressos everyone had ordered. Last night it seemed like I was not in Japan but was in Italy. It was a lovely evening hanging out with my fellow Canucks and basking in the sensation of being in Italy. As I walked to the train station the last thing I heard was a "Ciao, Bella", directed at me......

Oscar the Grouch

I am unhappy to report that the rainy season has started here. Good bye sunshine, we will see you in a few weeks. It will rain for about a month here. Not Vancouver rainy weather, but hot humid sticky rain that gets into your apartment and leaves you feeling damp and sticky. Plus creating a lovely haven for mold to flourish. Lovely....

Packing Report
One box of winter clothes ready to be sent. Two boxes almost ready to be sent, upteenth more to be found and packed with stuff...aiya...

I did not get yelled at by the garbage men this morning. This is a first for me. One of the most negative feelings I have about Japan stems from dealing with sorting my garbage. Not the actual physical process but the terror I have in confronting the men who take it from me. To make a long explanation short, garbage is divided into two types, burnable and non-burnable. Well, twice a month you take your non-burnable garbage to a community gathering place and put it into its assorted piles. I dread going and thus save it all up for one trip every 2 months. When I go there, I always manage to have my garbage thoroughly searched and bags ripped apart because I have somehow not sorted it right no matter how hard I try. I read the instruction book on garbage sorting and follow it religously but alas for the most part I get yelled at by these old men who sit there eyeing me suspiciously while I try to inconspicuously put it into its respective piles.

Well this morning, with my shoulders slouched in the anticipated tongue lashing in rapid fire Japanesee, I put my bags down and then promptly eye one of the old men pounce on it. He then proceeds to say something and I automatically pavlovian style say, "sumimasen, gomenasai"...only to realise that that was not my bag of garbage. I then proudly look at him with an air of defiance and say, that is not mine. This is the first time in 2 years that they did not pull apart MY bag in front of me and make me re-sort it into the "proper" piles all the while yelling to me in Japanese....triumph over the "garbage meanies"...

Today's thoughts

It is hot and humid today. I feel gross and sweaty and it is only 10:42 AM. I am tired from the humidity and the restless kids.

I saw 8 mile last night. It was good and I liked it. I was hoping to see the Matrix Reloaded but we got there late and it had already started. Will have to wait, I guess.

I have decided to stop fretting about jobs and housing. My good friend Ejlee gave me some words of wisdom and knocked some sense into me. Thanks Ejlee...still worried, but not going to let the uncertainty of my impending return govern my life. Just going to take things in strides.